You Said You Loved Me By Bukola Ode

You said you loved me
I took your word for it
You said you would bring me the moon, if I asked
I believed you
You said all that was yours would be mine
I never questioned it
Your one request was for faith in you, implicit trust
Who was I to turn down a thing so good, so true, so pure or so it seemed
Never once did I question what love meant
Did it mean kindness; a tenderness only experienced by newborns
Did it mean patience, when I haven’t got it right without you being riled up
Did it mean I could dream big dreams and bring home laurels without you being resentful
Did it mean when you’re doing great and I haven’t got it together, that you wouldn’t rub my nose in mud
Did it mean I could show off your laurels like they were mine as well
Did it mean that you would treat me with the courtesies only reserved for royalty
Did it mean you not being irritable all the time
Did it mean that I’d be forgiven when I err and that my wrongs will forever be forgotten
Did it mean you would not grin when I am hurt
Did it mean that you would never lie to me even when the truth makes you look awful
Did it mean that my faith could rest in your promise
Did it mean you would believe me even when all else says not to
Did it mean that I would be sheltered if and when the storms of life blow pass me
Did it mean that we could aspire, plan and wish for things together
Did it mean an unfailing dedication
Did love mean forever
They told me love is all these beautiful things and more
They told me love nurtures and handles with care
They told me that to be loved is chiefly to feel safe
I told them that they must have not met you
For a long time I was alone, in pain, living a lie and separated from reality because I was in an abusive relationship.
I eventually summoned up courage and sought help from friends, family and most importantly specialist support organisations.
I am happy now because of my life changing decision.
It’s given me so much peace within and made me realise that love doesn’t hurt

If you are in an abusive relationship and requires an urgent response or needs in-depth support please contact the National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0808 2000 247, the Men’s Advice Helpline on 0808 801 0327 or The National LGBT Helpline on 0300 999 5428.

You could also find support organisations using our ONLINE DIRECTORY